Sunday, August 18, 2013

Dear Expectant Mother,


There is so much we want to say to you. When we think about what kind of person you are and what the future holds for our relationship with you, the possibilities seem endless. I'm sure you've heard a number of phrases repeated over and over by other potential parents. While those phrases are probably completely true and heartfelt, I would imagine it can get a little frustrating. We're not going to say thank you, we respect you, you're so brave. We will show you how thankful we are by never taking for granted the gift you are entrusting to us. We will show our respect for you in every discussion we have about you with our child, our families, and our friends (while respecting your privacy as well). Your bravery will be clear to everyone our child meets and every life that is blessed through them. The fact that the best day of our lives is also possibly going to be the hardest day of yours, is not lost on us. We're not going to pretend to even grasp what this choice has been like for you. The number of people affected by your life altering love for your child extends in both directions. Our family will rejoice and celebrate with us, but we also know this child has another family. You might have people in your life who are struggling with your decision, who love and will miss your baby just as much as you. This child will know who they are. He or she will never wonder about where and who they came from. This child will know you. We know you will never stop being a mother, you will never stop loving your son or daughter, and you will never stop thinking about them. We know this because we already feel like parents, we already love this child, and we think about them all the time. We are together on this road. We pray for your peace, health, and strength. We pray that God blesses you above and beyond the blessing you're giving us.
Every family that tries to adopt wants to put their best foot forward. We are no different. But we would also be the first to admit we are not perfect. We argue, our house gets dirty, we live in the same world everyone else does. But we would also tell you every arguement ends with us still in love, the house is cozy and comfortable even with dishes in the sink, and we try everyday to appreciate the beauty and unpredictability of life. Our child will be loved, so incredibly loved, and given every opportunity. This does not mean they will get everything they want. Loved and spoiled rotten are not the same. There will be boundaries and appropriate behavior will be taught. Manors, respect, and moral fortitude will be expected. Fun will be had, laughter will be heard, and forgiveness will be readily available at all times. We look forward to the challenges of parenthood. We look forward to watching our child grow and growing with them. We look forward to starting this incredible journey with you. Whatever expectations you have of us, whatever hopes you have for your child's future, we will do everything in our power to make them come true. Know that this is not the end of anything. It is the beginning of something that is nothing short of miraculous. 
-Love, Josh and Kristen

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